Lost, Though Not Forgotten
by TF2KITTENS
Summary: After the loss of the team Medic, FemSniper is on her way to drink herself to sleep in the Intel room...but is stopped by the sound of Heavy's crying. Will they recover with a little help from one another? FemSniperXHeavy. R
1. Chapter 1

I'll always remember the day that our Medic died. It was a day of great loss and heartache for the RED team, and the somber silence that filled my heart was echoed throughout the squad. He was a great friend, our Medic. A bit doting at times, but always near to my heart. And then there was Heavy. He and Medic were never far from each other, especially in battle. Heavy was devastated, to say the least, and I know he blamed himself for the loss of our companion. Despite all of this, I found a friend and lover in the long weeks to come...

Being the only female on a team of men is a unique experience. It was tough at first; everyone underestimated me like crazy. But as I proved myself, I was quickly welcomed into the ranks with open arms. It seemed like I had something in common with everyone. Medic would make sure that I was the first one taken care of, though I told him to stop treating me differently because I was a girl. He would simply shrug and say, "I could never let anyzing happen to my favorite Sniper!" I know that everyone admired the fact that I broke the mold, and that killing came naturally to me. I was also pretty to look at; a shapely girl of 21.

It started out as an ordinary day, with Soldier barking at everyone and no one at the same time, Demoman throwing empty bottles at him, and Scout running circles around all of us. I rubbed my eyes and sat up, looking around. I saw Medic putting on his glasses, his hair awry. Though he was 20 years older than I, I couldn't help noting his attractiveness. I gave him a wave, and he smiled. The happiness in his eyes at that moment brings me to tears even now. I realize that I loved him, if only as a friend. I got ready for battle with a smile on my face.

While the attack siren blared through the speakers of '2fort', as we had dubbed our little piece of hell, I made my way to the battlements of RED base. Placing myself behind the metal barrier on the right, I surveyed the battlefield through the scope of my rifle. There was Scout, already on the BLU battlements, heading for the Intel; Demoman, shooting stickies at the BLU doorways; Heavy and Medic, charging forward and mowing down everyone in their way; everything was going according to plan. I caught a glimpse of BLU's Sniper searching for me; we would have a sort of "Sniper battle" of our own, most days. I sighted in quickly and brought my laser dot to his forehead...BOOM! I just barely caught him on the ear with that shot.

"He's good, that one," I thought to myself.

"Move Up!" Soldier barked, and I gathered myself to take a better position. Running back through our base, I jumped down the stairs and charged through the front door. I dodged a shot or two from the BLU Sniper as I charged across the small bridge in between the two bases, keeping my head low. As I got to BLU base I crouched near the twin doors in the front, aiming inside and hitting a BLU Pyro right in the face. His gurgled cry alerted a nearby BLU soldier to my presence, and as I got out my submachine gun, Heavy and Medic reduced him to mere shreds of flesh and cloth. I nodded to them in thanks.

We were gonna win this one, I knew it. If Pyro and Scout were doing as well as I was, then our victory would be assured in a matter of minutes. With Heavy and Medic clearing the narrow center passage, I entered BLU base and took a right. My path was free of enemies, and I jogged toward the courtyard. I saw Medic's back to me, and I allowed a smile to come to my lips.

"We won," I said to myself.

And then I saw the silhouette of the BLU Spy, uncloaking behind our Medic; I opened my mouth at the sheer horror of what was happening. I managed a cry of, "Medic!", and my friend had barely turned his shoulder when the BLU assassin's knife caught him right in the back. Our RED Medic sank to the ground silently as Heavy went forward, not knowing yet what had happened.

I unsheathed my kukiri and with an anguished scream, I charged forward and hacked at the BLU Spy, not stopping until I saw the look of horror and surprise on his lifeless face. I sank to my knees, dropping my machete and allowing the tears to flow freely. To my surprise, Medic was still alive, but just barely. I think he was holding on to say goodbye.

I cradled his head in my hands, and he tried to say something. I brought my head closer to his lips, and I barely heard him say: "Be careful..." I bit my bottom lip to hold back a wrenching sob, and whispered to my dying friend, "Please don't leave!" He looked up at me with those wise blue eyes one last time; they said everything. A lone tear rolled down his dust streaked face, and he smiled, as sincerely as he had just that morning and so many times before. His eyelids closed, and I knew he was gone. In the midst of this scene, my comrades had secured BLU base and won us the battle...at a price.

I clenched my eyes closed, screaming at the top of my lungs, "HELP! SOMEONE!" I couldn't hold back my grief any longer, and my gut wrenching cries of anguish caught everyone's attention all at once. They got to us as fast as they could, Heavy being the fist to arrive. I looked up at him, his face blurred behind my hot tears. His face contorted into a mask of pure suffering, and he crouched on the opposite side of Medic's body. He scooped up the limp form of our comrade into his arms, and his body shook with silent sobs. Engineer removed his hardhat; Scout kicked idly at a small patch of grass in the dust, and I saw a tear dampen the ground at his feet. The whole team was mourning, in their own way.

We buried our friend behind our base; I made sure that he was dressed just as he had been that morning. The ceremony was simple. No one said anything, and one after one everyone on the team paid their last respects. Under the sun of our wasteland, we grieved as a whole. Heavy lingered the longest, barely able to remain standing under the weight of his anguish. My heart broke for him.


	2. Chapter 2

That night, everyone took dinner separately. I ate in silence atop the battlements, looking up at the stars and searching for an answer. RED team had nothing to fear from the BLU's now; it would be a while before reinforcements came. But they would come. I sipped the last of my beer and gazed once more to the heavens. Would Medic be watching over me? Would he want everyone to mope around like this? Unanswered questions filled my mind with unrest. I stood and headed back inside.

I dragged my feet with every step I took, giving the few I passed small nods of acknowledgement. I was going to go down to the Intel room; I knew that was where Spy would be, and I really needed to bum a smoke off of him. Maybe I would even break out the hard liquor to share with him. I didn't think he would mind. I took the long way, considering where I was; I didn't even think, really, about where I was going. I just kind of went. I clomped down the stairs, hearing my footfalls on the metal steps. I wanted to collapse, but I just couldn't go to sleep in that state.

Staring at the ground in front of me, I finally reached the bottom of the stairs. A sound shook me from my melancholy; it was coming from the nearby resupply room, the one Medic used to use as a makeshift hospital. Sounds of great sorrow were coming from beyond the sheet metal door and I knew of only one person it could be: Heavy. I knew he would be bawling his eyes out in there, and through my own sorrow, I was overcome with the urge to comfort him. So I walked toward the door of the resupply room.

I gave a soft knock before entering. The automatic door made a soft "whoosh" as I stepped through it, and even though my footfalls were loud, I could barely hear them. Heavy had his back to me, sitting on one of the low benches on the left side of the room. His broken cries put me on the verge of tears myself, but I knew I had to be strong and comforting for his sake. I shuffled over to him, placing a soft hand on his broad shoulder. He didn't seem to notice, so I gave him a reassuring rub on the back. I took a seat beside him.

"Hey," I began, "are you going to be alright?"

He tried to compose himself, but to no avail. He looked at me, bottom lip quivering, and collapsed into me. Heavy, being so large, almost knocked me clean off the bench, but I managed to steady myself somehow. He was crying into my chest, wetting my shirt with his big tears.

"Shh.." I whispered, rubbing the top of his head. "It will be alright, I promise you."

His crying got softer as time went by, until he was just resting on me. I wrapped my arms around his head and neck, and pressed my cheek to the back of his skull. I held him there, giving him soft kisses on the back of his head and rocking him in my arms for hours, days…time had no place in this small room. Heavy removed himself from our embrace, looking up at me like a child.

"Do you really think everything will be OK?" He asked. I nodded.

"I know that right now Medic is watching us and that he misses you very much." I grabbed one of his big hands, and held it in both of mine. "I know that he is very proud of you."

This set his bottom lip quivering again, but before tears could come I slyly added: " And you know what else he's thinking?"


	3. Chapter 3

Heavy shook his head, absorbing my every word. I stood up and cracked my neck from side to side, turning to face his slouching form.

"I bet he's wondering…"-I took a step toward Heavy- "if you are…"-I poised myself-"TICKLISH!"

I pounced on him, tickling his sides as best as I could. This sent him laughing like crazy; he could have never expected that in his wildest dreams. His deep laugh was contagious; I was laughing my ass off too, if I may say so. It was nice to laugh in such a time of sadness, and know that we could remember our friend so fondly.

We struggled for a while until we ended up rolling completely off of the bench altogether! Heavy's body made a thump as it hit the floor softly, and we wrestled for a few more seconds until we were in the middle of the room, Heavy on top of me. He didn't crush me, as may have been expected; he propped himself up on a strong, muscled arm. The blue eyes of the big Russian stared into mine with numerous emotions, so many that I couldn't read them. I wondered what he saw in my brown eyes; could he see the sadness, the pain, and the love in them? I let out a deep, comfortable sigh. We stared at each other for several minutes, pondering what the other was thinking. Heavy soon slowly brought up one of his big hands to give my left cheek a soft caress. I closed my eyes, and nuzzled my face into the warm palm of my friend.

"Mmm," I mumbled, enjoying the closeness. It was nice to feel a soft touch after going so long without.

I rolled over, taking Heavy's large hand in mine. I pressed my lips to his rough fingertips, enjoying the gentle feel of this encounter. We were comforting each other; it wasn't really something that we thought about. The silent understanding was all that we needed.

I barely allowed my tongue to trace the tip of each of his huge fingers, tasting the salty remnants of dried tears. I felt a rumble of delight come from my friend, and I felt him shift his weight slightly. He removed his hand from my lips and gently rolled me on to my back. Always moving, I raised my right hand to caress the left side of his face. The rough stubble under my fingertips was a good contrast to the softness of my hands. Putting his hand behind my head, he raised me to his lips and kissed me softly on the forehead.

In battle, Heavy was a behemoth, not stopping until all of his enemies were dead or dying. But the man that I was with then was nothing of the Russian terror he was on the battlefield. He was soft, gentle, and kind; something that someone wouldn't know from looking at him. I would never look at him the same way ever again, and my heart would soften every time he looked at me with those huge blue eyes of his.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, brushing my nose beside his. I stared into his eyes for a moment before giving him a slow, gentle kiss on the lips. Heavy had such soft lips, so big that they enveloped mine in an instant. We needed each other's touch. I drew back for an instant for a breath of air, then dived back in for more. My tongue explored his hot, wet mouth as if searching for an answer to all of our questions.

I moved down to his collarbone, giving him quick small kisses on his exposed skin.

"Heavy…" I whispered as I gave his ear a teasing flick with my tongue.

He groaned slightly at my sucking on his earlobe; I marked this as a sensitive spot, and continued exploring his skin. Before I got too far, though, Heavy reclaimed control of the situation. He turned my head towards him and drew me forward for another kiss. I couldn't get enough of him; the taste of a sandwich and beer, not too strong, and perhaps cake, judging by the sweetness. Things were going slowly, just as they should have.

As we were lip locked, I felt Heavy draw a line down my chest to my stomach. I wondered what he would do next, and was surprised when I felt him tickling me, just above my bellybutton. His hands sent sparks downward, as well as making me laugh and wiggle just a little bit.

"You silly," I said, winking.

I sat up, looking to where he sat on his knees in front of me. His breathing was a little faster than usual, and his face was flushed just slightly. I raised myself up to his ear.

"Are you sure you're ready?" I asked, genuinely not wanting to take advantage of him…any more than I already had.

He loomed over me, and in response, slid a large hand under the fabric of my shirt. His slightly calloused fingertips against my smooth, soft skin was heavenly. He gently caressed my stomach, and with his free hand he removed my shirt altogether. It was a bit chilly in the room, and goose bumps started to form on my skin. I chuckled nervously, a little embarrassed. There was also the little tinge of guilt in the back of my mind…what was I trying to gain here?

Before I had too much time to think, Heavy nuzzled his head against my neck and chest. I kissed his scalp, letting my fingers play at the collar of his red shirt. I couldn't focus, though, and I had to voice my thoughts.

"I'm not taking advantage of you, am I Heavy?" He looked up at me, his eyes serious and a little hurt. He took my chin in his hand.

"You are making me better inside," he said, rubbing my jaw line with his thumb. I started to voice more questions, but he hushed me with a finger to my lips.

"To tell the truth," he began," I find you very pretty girl. I thank you for helping me. And this is how."

Any other protest that I was going to voice was immediately silenced with a full frontal assault on my delicate mouth by Heavy's gracious lips. I still had doubt swimming in my mind, but my friend wasn't giving me the chance to interject; but in reality, I didn't really want to.


End file.
